If Father Beauvais or any other priest of SSPX wants to know what I write of myself and what is prompted by some spirit, good or bad, why does he not simply ASK? If I pretend to write as a scholastic (at times) and as a novelist and as a poet and as a common writer generally, why does he not judge according to THAT CLAIM rather than persist in suspecting "private revelations" that might not come from God?
My guess is someone told him something and he refuses to doubt that person as much as he refuses to trust me. That might be the case with a psychiatrist, it might be the case with some holder of secular authority, it might be the case with some Novus Ordo authority or someone else claiming for me what I do not claim myself.
So, why this beating about the bush? Is it of God?
Now, if he does not suspect a thing like that, I would like to know why:
a) I still have no verbal answer directed from SSPX to me, as about my dispute with him alluded to previously;
b) I get across, providentially it seems, the warnings of St John of the Cross against sensual revelations.
The situation blocks my life. I have not made a "votum perpetuae castitatis" and do not like to be treated as if I had. I have earthly hopes, which are time after time dashed by the silent suspicion of priests who accuse very obviously in their hearts, but refuse to accuse verbally.
Hans-Georg Lundahl
Bibliothèque Château d'Eau
26-IX-2012
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